Waiting for the box fairy to come...

We have been in our house almost a week now. First to get settled was Penn and Jude's bedroom. Next was ours. Then...everything else. We're in phase three right now and I'm pretty sure we're never going to be able to park a car in our garage. How come we have no space for this stuff and it's a bigger house?

I did manage to clear the million-and-one boxes off our front porch today so it didn't look like the Sanfords lived here. I think it made a huge difference. Now, all I need are a few green plants to put here or there and the outside of our house will be done for now (the backyard will have to wait...don't get me started).

I think I've unpacked all the boxes in the house with the exception of the garage, the computer room (Mr. Packard will handle that beauty), and the dining room. I really, REALLY want to get my dining room in "dining" condition, but we're going to be painting at some point and I hate to put my china in the cabinet and then have to move it around to paint.

I hate boxes. I hate packing paper. I hate that brown tape that I've been finding all over the house. But I LOVE this new house and can't wait to put pictures up of the rooms once we get everything "straightened." Oh well, enough for now. Bedtime!

Mixed emotions

I'm fine today, but two days ago at this time I was literally in tears. Tomorrow I might be blissfully happy. Who knows these days??? This house selling/house buying process all at the same time is turning me into an emotional wreck. I'm nervous, anxious, excited, and everything in between.

I cannot bear the thought of leaving the house I brought my children home to. I mean, when I think of the sweet life we had here at this house, I will always remember that this is the place where Penn and Jude spent their baby days. Leaving our home is kind of like having to accept some strange rite of passage into another chapter of the book of our lives where are children actually grow up. So sad.

I'll always remember how I swept the kitchen floor in the hours before we went to the hospital to be induced with Penn. We celebrated the first year of his life in our backyard. How we sat in our bedroom the day I found out Penn was going to be a brother. I'll never forget the sound of Penn's feet running down the wood floors in the hallway in the middle of the night, trying to get oriented enough to find our room. Or how both boys would stand at the front door and watch their daddy get home from being gone a week.

That last thought makes me so glad. I am so grateful to be able to be with my husband again and not have to plan our lives around when he will be "in town." I want him to help me put them to bed at night, turn out the lights, and make sure the house is safe and secure. I want to grow into this new house, which we love. I want to live like a family again.

So, I realize that I'm sounding a little over-dramatic...whatever. I know people move every day, but that doesn't make it any easier for me. My hope is that when we actually get into the process of moving, I'll forget about all the sentiments and just be distracted by the task at hand, For now, I am left alone with my thoughts, which are bouncing around like a ping-pong game in my brain.

Any thoughts to help me cope?

Stressed to the MAX!

It doesn't feel like this roller coaster will ever end! Our house is sold, pending the inspection. We bought another house, pending Florence inspection and Richmond inspection...it's a double whammy! I am SO nervous that the buyers of our house are going to want us to do repairs that we can't pay for. I don't think anything's wrong, but you never know. Hopefully, they'll go through with it and we won't have to fix much.

On the other hand, I am so excited about our new house. Unfortunately, it's going to be about a month and a half until we close on it, so we have quite a long wait. We won't be in it until summer time so that means we will have to find a place to stay for that length of time. Will it be our parents' houses or a hotel suite for three or more weeks? Tough call--for real!

We'll I'll keep this short and sweet. Hopefully we'll know something about the inspection before the weekend so I can get some sleep again. Let's get this ball rolling!

House-hunting is...

...fun (not always), exciting (can be), frustrating (yep), headache inducing (uh-huh). I've spent the last two days looking at three-inch pictures of our possible future home and I've already had enough. Online house-hunting is for the birds...I'm done. We have emailed the realtor (about 15 times a day) and we've given her a list of some houses we are interested in. I assume that she'll have some houses up her sleeve as well and we've scheduled a trip to Richmond for this weekend so we can see some of these babies up close. I'm exhausted. I'm hoping she's got some good ones (in our price range) scheduled first thing in the morning so we can check em out, make an offer, and head home. Unfortunately, that may not be the case and we might be doing this again for another few weeks. We are so ready to be there. Together.

On the other hand...we are petrified!!! I lived away from home my first year in college and I did okay, but now that I have children, it's a whole different ball game. Pack and I are both scared that we'll get all moved in and Penn's gonna start crying for one of his grandmas. I keep telling myself (and Pack) that he's only two (almost three) and he'll adjust just like kids do all over the place. Families move. Kids survive. We'll only be a few hours away and we've already decided we'll be coming home to SC at least once a month for a while until we feel more at home.

Kids aside, I can't begin to explain how much I will miss my parents, my siblings, my entire extended family. I may not get to see them all very often, but it's somehow reassuring to know that they're close if I need them. We want to buy as huge a house as our budget will allow so we can just have everyone come up and stay with us whenever they want...or we want. I hope they will. Richmond is a great place to vacation guys, I promise!

Prayers, please...this is getting real.

Just a fraction of my heart I'll be leaving...

OFFER...YES!!!

So today we got our first offer on the house...and it was more than we were hoping to get, so THANK YOU, LORD!!! I have been avoiding this blog for a while now because I dreaded spreading that there was no news on our house. Well, this is definitely news and we are thrilled!

So, all day I've been thinking about God's perfect timing and I keep referring back to these same points that keep reminding me that we really are doing the right thing:

*Pack got this job about a month before we would have been TOTALLY broke from me not working. His new income pretty much makes up for my lost one.

*We are moving to Richmond, VA where we will be only a few hours away from home and Pack will still be based back in Florence making family more accessible.

*While waiting 7 months on our house to sell, we have been able to pay down some debt and get our finances under control so we're prepared for the higher cost of living while in VA.

*Our house gets a contract on it just two days after I take a walk alone around our beautiful neighborhood and tell God, "I'm okay just where I am." That's the first time I ever consciously told myself to STOP GRIPING about not being where I want to be and to be happy being where I am! I put on a good show for others, you know..."All in good time," but I didn't really mean it until this weekend.

*Pack gets a larger than normal bonus (thanks to his hard work), which we can use to help us with a down payment on our house.

God really has known what is best for us all along! And he keeps giving us the reassurances that we are doing the right thing. All day I keep saying, "This is not a coincidence!" When my faith is stretched and I have to step out and just trust that God will take care of us--he always does.

ps...Hopefully, my next post will be titled, "SOLD!" *prayers, please*

By George...

I think I've finally got this two-kid thing down! Life has eased up a bit on me lately and I'm soaking it up! Jude, my non-napper/sleeper, has finally conceded to taking two "scheduled" naps a day and Penn, as usual, is down for the count at almost exactly one-thirty every day. PRAISE THE LORD! That's the best thing that's happened in quite some time and I'm actually looking at getting some down-time every day again (aside from nighttime, where I will fall asleep as soon as I get in a semi-horizontal position).

So here's our recent family goings-on:

• Christmas
  

So sad it's gone, right? Seriously...you get your tree up and decorated, presents all nicely wrapped under it, and it just "smells" like Christmas. Then in no time at all, your house is destroyed, the tree comes down, and you wonder if you've always had this much empty space in your house. Oh yeah, except for the toys...the mounds and mounds of toys that, once opened, creep into every room in the house and under every piece of furniture. Ugh! My kids have way too much stuff, but it's so hard not to make it BIG for them!

We had an amazing Christmas! Penn woke up on Christmas morning and immediately grabbed for the two ornament-shaped Cokes that Santa brought. He was so excited! Yeah...Santa brought a wagon with a roof and tons of toys too, but the "ball Cokes" stole the show...should have known!

We spent all day traveling at warp speed. From our house to my parents', then to the in-laws, and finally to the Carmon family Christmas (all day in the pouring rain), we had a pretty crazy day, but it reminded me how truly blessed I am for having such a close family. I can't imagine giving up even one of our "engagements."

• Mama

A few days after Christmas, Mama's diverticulitis began acting up again. She's still in the boat for surgery in the next few weeks and we're just hoping that she feels better soon. She'll got from times of feeling pretty normal, to being laid up in the bed. Just hearing her talk, you know how she's feeling. I think she'll feel like a new woman once they get this under wraps. Who knows how long she's been letting this fester!

• New Year

If there's one thing this past year has taught me, it's that you can't get moments back. Through Jude's pregnancy and birth, Cam's deployment, Aunt Connie's death, Pack's promotion, and our transition to Virginia, our family has experienced joy, sadness, excitement, worry, and fear to the extreme this year. 2009 was bittersweet. I am saying goodbye to a decade that (for the most part), made my life what it is. I started dating Pack in 2000, got married in 2005, and babies in 2007 and 2009! Those were my most joyous moments. Then there were the times of sorrow...the death of my last remaining grandparent, the sudden loss of my sweet Aunt, seeing my parents go through their own struggles of health and well-being, and the loss of other family and friends. There is no getting those moments back to experience them one last time (and for some, I am thankful for that), but I am so blessed to have had the moments that remind me just how special family really is!

• Virginia

Speaking of 2009, I was disappointed in not including a MOVE to Virginia to wrap up the decade. Unfortunately, we are still trying to sell our adorable home that I love so much. I can't imagine living anywhere else with my boys, but I know we'll adjust well and it will be so, so nice to have Daddy home all the time again. Hopefully, I'll still be able to stay home with them when we move, but you never know...houses don't come cheap!

• Green Stuff

I'm talking about money...the insufficient amount of it. I have graciously offered to take the finances off Pack hands and make budgeting my responsibility. Maybe a better way to say this would be that I relieved Pack of the burden of my spending (I don't spend on me though!!!). I'm trying to lay out a budget and cook more regularly because I actually think that we can waste less and save more if I quit letting everything in my pantry and fridge go bad! This should also impact our waistlines (I hope, I hope), thus being good for the planet...haha! For the past few months, I've been "priming" myself to get started becoming the best "homemaker" I can be and not having to worry as much about money would be a great start! I know myself well enough to know that jumping in with both feet is never my style...I've always like to dip a toe in gradually and get used to the water. Maybe in another year, I'll be able to report that I'm a regular tree huggin', coupon clippin', penny pinchin', baby-sittin' (ok, SAHM'in) gal!

NOW...seeing as how this is the longest stretch of "alone time" I've had to blog, I better get ready for the GREAT AWAKENING!

The Sound of Silence...

Since Pack's out of town so much, "Mommy time" has really been lacking lately. So much, in fact, that I have actually been looking forward to my dentist appointment today because that means going out in public sans tots! I called Mrs. G. last week (the most awesome babysitter in the universe) and lined her up to keep both the boys for me during my appointment, which is around two in the afternoon. She, very graciously, offered to meet me at the library this morning and let the boys ride home with her after Story Time (which today, by the way, reminded me a little of what my worst nightmare might be like), saving me from having to drive all the way out to Coward and back, and giving me a few lonely (not in a bad way) hours to play with. Boy, did I need it! I shopped at a bookstore, swung by Starbucks, and headed home to eat my lunch without having to balance Jude on one knee and my lunch on the other, or keeping Penn from feeding all of his lunch to our dog. I felt like I was at a spa eating my chicken patty between bread (okay, maybe not a spa, but definitely a relaxing place). So now I'm waiting for my appointment time, reflecting on this most welcome blessing of relaxation time. Mrs. G may never read this to really understand the depths of my thanks, but I'll make sure to tell her..."Thanks a million...interested in moving to Virginia???"

Selling Houses Stinks!!!

Pack and I are going crazy. We kind feel like we're in real estate Limbo. We have found several house/neighborhoods in Richmond/Chesterfield that we really like a lot, but we can't take any action because our house in Florence is still for sale. Any bites? Yes, a few "nibbles." Basically, we haven't had any serious lookers and we're starting to get really frustrated with this whole process. Pack has officially started his new job in VA and he's traveling there during the week, which puts me home alone with the kids. And let me make it clear that I am not cut out for single parenting...NOT FOR ME! I can't wait to have my family under one roof again!

Now that we've got that rant out of the way, let's move on from things we can't change...

Jude is getting SO BIG! I can't believe how much he's grown and he's catching on. He's waving and kissing and I'm enjoying his baby days sooo much! I remember with Penn being so excited and eager for him to crawl, walk, eat solids, you know...milestones, that I really didn't get to enjoy his baby-hood the way I'm trying to with Jude. I try to hold him a lot because I know he doesn't get held quite as much as Penn did (consequence of being the second child, I guess). Anyway, one day, I set him down on the rug and he flipped right over onto his belly, tucked his legs under his body, and started rocking back and forth on his chubby little thighs! He might have been doing that for a while, but Mommy didn't notice because I was too busy trying to keep him as my baby forever! Can I freeze frame him right here??? Even as young as Penn is, I miss the downy soft hair, non-smelly feet and breath, completely unscarred, unblemished skin, gummy grins...I could just eat him!!!

On the other hand, the starting solids phase has been a little rocky for us. I started letting him taste baby food at 4 months (just as I did with Penn). I was kind of hoping it would help him sleep better at night, but he didn't take to it well, so I waited a week and tried again. No luck. We did this little dance off and on until he was about five months, at which time, I started feeding him more regularly. Now he's six months old, and is just getting past apple sauce and rice cereal. I am constantly reminded of how different every baby is, but it's so hard not to compare.

I've also been having some anxiety over my breastfeeding experience. I started working as a long-term sub for a co-worker at DLC (just for six weeks, approximately), and I had built of up a nice little stash of frozen breastmilk that I had pumped off and on since Jude was a couple of months old. Well, my little monster tore through that "nice little stash" in a little over a week and even with me pumping twice during the workday (and it isn't easy to get out of my classroom and find a private spot for 15 minutes twice a day), I wasn't keeping up! At one point, I had to start pumping FOUR TIMES A DAY! I cannot even begin to express how much I hate pumping, so this only lasted three or four days before I came up with my solution. I still pump at work, but usually only once or maybe twice, and I'm sending formula to the babysitter to feed him when he drinks all his milk. This ends up being the equivalent to about six ounces of formula a day, but I feel like I'm digging myself a hole. I'm planning on nursing full time, once I'm home again in another couple of weeks, but I'm concerned that I might lose some of my supply. I'm hoping that just as my body adjusted to different feeding shedules with Penn, I'll also adjust flawlessly with Jude too (I know...comparing again!), but we'll have to see.

Now for my sweet Penn...oh how I love him! He's still as rotten as ever, and sometimes we see a little bully creep out of his personality, but this kid always amazes us! Just last week, we discovered he could count backwards from 1o and he knew his left from his right! Let me take this time to say he's got the best babysitter in the world who always reads to him, teaches him about nature, and has the most fun house ever! He always makes us laugh too! I think the phrase, "Kids say the darndest things," was written for our little Penn. He's addicted to bouncy balls, carries around a red cooler filled with balls and other toys, and loves to snuggle with his mommy and watch "Ant Bully."

I could go on for days about my sweet babies. I never imagined I could love two little people like this. A taste of God's love for us. I would give my life for these two precious boys and I can't wait to get to know them more.